Out of some weird act of God, Chocolate Party Hats ended up on Gizmodo (thanks Jason Chen) this past Wednesday.

We have been deluged with orders and requests…thank you we appreciate the heavy response! Three things have come to my attention based on the responses we have received that I want to clarify.

• Privacy
• Nutritional Facts
• Is this a real product?

I’ll start with the last concern. Yes, it is very real! I will take pictures tonight to show the packaging and scale of the product so stay tuned.

Nutritional Facts - Ingredients: Cocoa mass, sugar, cocoa butter, soya lecithin (emulsifier), and natural vanilla. This product is produced in a facility where milk products and tree nuts are used. It is gourmet dark chocolate imported form Belgium that has a 64% Cocoa content.

Privacy - All your iformation is kept extremely private. The package you receive says it is from ANovelT LLC in a plain brown cardboard box. As for email SPAM you won’t get any - I hate it and I don’t like sending it. I WILL NOT sell, rent, or give away ANY of your personal information.

Keep the questions coming! I will try to stay on top of them better.

Thank you,

Dick Diggler

I hate to do this to you, but I love shock value.

So today a friend sent me a hilarious photo, it’s got to be fake…but that being said this is definitely one for the “Oh Jesus, That’s Just Not Right” folder.

Concerned about how your lady will react to your Chocolate Party Hat? I understand…so to remedy the situation I had an idea based after seeing a recent ad in the paper for the Krispy Kreme Heart donut.

Try testing the waters with what I call the “Krispy Kremer.“

I’ve not yet met a person who can resist the delectable allure of a fresh warm Krispy Kreme donut. So I propose you hope in the car, run down to the local Krispy Kreme and pick up a dozen.

Once you get home rub your pony until he’s rearing to go. In some cases you may need to pop a little blue pill or get the juices flowing with a little Internet based visual lubricant. When you’re ready, throw one of those sugar coated gems of fried dough in the microwave for the magic seven seconds. Finally toss one or two of those warm puppies onto your happy John Thomas.

What did you think that hole was for anyway?

You may need to wash your hands because that sugar coating gets everywhere. If you’re not careful it could end up in your ass crack (which may be an adventure unto itself if you’re into that sort of thing). Now go find your lady-friend or hop in the bed and call for her.

If she walks in the room, rolls her eyes, and walks away…I’d get a new woman.

More than likely though, she’ll laugh her ass off and you both will have a little fun.

Warning…too many Krispy Kremers will turn your hot mama into a gross fat-ass, so please use your best judgment. Addictions can have unfortunate consequences.

Enjoy!

A friend sent me this via email the other day, I thought it was pretty funny. It’s a remake of the Burger King Freakout Commercial, but from a Ghetto point of view out of Minneapolis. If you don’t like excessive swearing then I suggest you enjoy some of our other previous posts.

YouTube Link 

I sent a package to Ace & TJ (radio show mentioned in previous post) thanking them for being one of the main inspirations behind DickHats. My hope is that they are feeling generous this Valentines Day and give away the free DickHats I sent them. You may want to prod them for a free one by contacting them here.

Anyhow, in the accompanying letter included in the package, I told them that I was feeling generous lately. And to show my appreciation for the inspiration they bestrode, I decided to help the charity they support called Grin Kids. Each year they sell various station sponsored schwag to send several children with autism and other life debilitating diseases to Disney World for a day.

So here’s what I’m doing up until April Fools Day 2008…For every chocolate DickHat/Chocolate Party Hat that is sold, I will donate $2.00 to the Grin Kid’s charity as an unofficial rogue sponsor! Hopefully they won’t be disappointed to receive money from a less than conventional source since I never discussed this with them prior to this post. But who cares…money’s money right?

I am hoping to raise at least $2,000. That’s 1,000 DickHats folks…so these kids need your help. I felt that this would be fun way to help people help other people. So if you’ve been waffling over “to hat or not to hat,” hopefully this will help ease your decision.

Thanks for help!

Dickhats are a new gig for me. My background is actually in graphic design and marketing…I’m a Photoshop fiend, but I don’t brag about it…most of the time. In fact, I used to teach it, but I am no match for Donnie.

Not that his technical skills are better than mine, but he is a hell of a lot more entertaining than I ever was. Take a few minutes out of your time and educate yourself while you watch Donnie work his Photoshop magic and listen to his hilarious personal problems.