Turns out that some food scientists over at Texas A & M figured out that a chemical in the rind of watermelon helps relax blood vessels in the body. Supposedly, citrulline is the secret ingredient found in the white part of the rind that gives you that “little extra lift.”

So if you don’t want to spend the money on that little blue pill; cut off a few pieces of the big green rind and eat that. Be sure to call your doctor if you experience an erection lasting longer than four hours.

Then again if you don’t have a lot of trouble in that department you can always cut a hole in that sexy thing and make your contribution to science like this guy.

Forgive me faszha for I have sinned it has been at least three weeks since my last post…

Pick up a copy of the July issue of Playgirl magazine and skip to the back…page 88 to be exact. They give Chocolate Party Hats a lovely mention along with fifteen other naughty lady friendly items.

I want to thank Associate Editor Jessanne Collins for the honor of being included and a copy of the July 2008 issue. I have to say that I am somewhat jealous. You ladies get a ton more nudie pics per issue than we guys do in Playboy or Penthouse. That’s okay, I only read them for the articles anyway.

You can also find Chocolate Party Hats on the Playgirl Magazine’s blog.

Naked Cowboy Photo courtesy of Wikipedia - see him in the buff in July 2008 issue of Playgirl magazine.

Wow…I’ve heard of chocolate penises and chocolate labia, but this new chocolate takes the cake.

The Edible Anus

*Cue the Budweiser Beer commercial music*

Here’s to you Mr. Chocolate Asshole inventor… (background singer - Incredible Edible Anus)

No sorry this is not one of my products, my chocolate creations don’t venture below the taint. I don’t quite get the limited edition Silver brown-eyes…but they are funny. It’s definitely a paperweight that will make people ask questions.

They call them Bisous - I’d also buy ChocolateStinkNuggets.com just for the fun of it. It’s probably a joke, but if the inventor is wanting to make some mad cash they need to see if they can get a famous porn star to be the molded model for the product.  I’m sure many a men out there wouldn’t mind popping a few Jenna Jameson chocolates in their pie hole. The street cred you could get from saying you licked Jenna Jameson’s Never-Never Land would be worth something to the male ego. Hell, it doesn’t even need to be a famous porn star…just some really hot chick.

FREE MILLION DOLLAR IDEA ALERT

In fact, if I was a hot chick and I was into doing Web Videos, I’d mold my full frontal and make chocolates to sell. Here’s your tag line - Like what you see…why don’t you eat me? You could put yourself through college 10 times over if you sold chocolates to supplement your video earnings. Talk about a self made millionaire!

Hat tip to Geekologie for this one - Hey Geekologie writer guy, how come you never gave DickHats some play on your site?

I almost fell out of my seat when I watched this; found it over on Fake Steve Jobs blog today. This is probably what it really is like to be in the Hillary Clinton camp right now.

Inside the Mind of Hillary Clinton

I love the part about the kittens…priceless.

Bill’s my favorite, in fact I have several FREE DickHats waiting for him if he would just return my calls. At least I know he’d use them. Hey Bill, call me…

I’m Dick Diggler and I approve this message!

Over the past two months, not only have we been approached by PlayGirl magazine…but we have also been asked by two television production companies in the UK for DickHat samples to feature on their shows.

Crazy! I figured the Brits would love Chocolate Party Hats, after all, the original women’s poll that inspired the product did come from the UK. (See The DickHats Story)

Anyway, I’m really excited…one will be on an upcoming new talkBack Thames series about sex and the other set may be on The F Word (starring Gordon Ramsay - which could be bad thing, think Hell’s Kitchen).

I’m still waiting on that call from Comedy Central…you hear’in me Stephen Colbert? LOL! I’d even settle for immortalizing Chocolate Party Hats in South Park.

We are letting you help decide what DickHat we are going to produce next. With the recent licensing hiccup on the One-eyed Spartan Helmet DickHat, we wanted to replace it with one that everyone finds just as exciting. So for the next few weeks we are doing a poll to find the next big Chocolate Party Hat chosen by you.

Wait…What about the cash? Place your vote then scroll below the poll to find out.

 Loading …

Bonus Opportunity!

Do you have a website or your own blog, Facebook, Squidoo, Hubpages, MySpace, or Twitter account?

Would you like to win up to 10 FREE DickHats and $100 cash?
The rules are simple and you can enter as many times as you like.

Send and email to dickhatpoll [ at ] chocolatepartyhats [ .com ] if you are interested in entering the contest. Be sure to put this address on your email’s safe senders list to insure that you receive our reply message.

Hurry though, entries for this contest will end 11:59 PM (US Eastern Time) July 10, 2008.

Man, what’s up with YouTube?

This is ridiculous - YouTube took our commercial down, little bitches. Some scrotal hair of a human being probably had a problem with it. If mine was so bad, then I think you need to take down the other 100+ videos that feature dildos.

To be honest…I don’t really know why, I’m just fucking pissed right now…Terms of Use violation my ass! It’s not like they’ll give you a good reason even if you ask. Don’t tell me that was a copyright violation…there are like a 100 other Head On commercial spoofs still on there.

Reading back through I found this in the Terms of Service -

“uploading an original video to YouTube, or maintaining an original channel on YouTube, to promote your business or artistic enterprise; ”

Bullshit! What about all those BlendTec videos?

So if you still want to see the original DickHats commercial go to Revver here:

http://www.revver.com/video/632095/dickhats-are-you-getting-enough-hat-in-2008/

Turns out I’ve been having trouble with videos all over the place - my Triggit Video Placement got broken when I made my last WordPress update. This f’ed my Bird Video in the other post; so far this has not been a good two weeks for me video wise. That’s ok, I took it down for now…I am remaking it in Slide Share.

I’m done whining now…thanks for listening.

Oh and YouTube - piss off!

I saw this on Geekologie the other day. Apparently there is a small cheese manufacturer in France that produces cheese from human breast milk. I guess it’s real, I can read French, but here’s the website. Supposedly it’s organic…whatever that means.

To be honest I won’t eat it unless I know it is made from the finest Cambodian Breast Milk – we all have our standards!

April Fools Day is close. I was hoping to get this post up faster than I have, but you still have time to make this prank happen.

It should only take no more than an hour to make this fun little gag as long as you have all the pieces and parts. I will sell these soon, I didn’t have time to get them manufactured before April 1st, so I decided to do the next best thing.

See video for construction instructions!

Parts List:

• Smash ball window sticker - Golf ball version
• Fake decorative bird - Usually for wreaths, find at Craft Stores like Michaels
• 5-Minute Epoxy
• 1 high-strength Neodymium magnet
• 1 countersink screw - like sheet rock screw
• 1 sheet of paper
• (optional) transparent red faux stained glass paint

Tools:

• Dremel Tool with cutting disk or hack saw
• X-acto knife

Well what do you know…I was contacted the other day by the Editor of PlayGirl magazine! they said that they were interested in some Chocolate Party Hats. I said “No Problem!” So we sent them a few last week and now it looks like our chocolate phallic fashion statements are going to be featured in the July 2008 issue of PlayGirl magazine.

HOW COOL IS THAT!

My wife keeps bugging me to tell her when we are going to get the PlayGirl sample issue. I told her I’d give it to her when she stops getting high on my Chocolate Party Hat supply. That’s right, she’s addicted. Sometimes I wish the Internet had smell-o-vision, once you open your DickHat package, you’ll see exactly what I mean.

As for the other bloggers who have blogged about the product - I am truly grateful! I will eventually get around to sending you some link love here soon. I have the address for many of you and have not had the opportunity to send you your samples yet. The orders we have received over the past two weeks have been overwhelming our fulfillment process. I want to publicly let you know that I haven’t forgotten about you.

I am about to offer a nice special to the Fleshbot readers, so if you fancy yourself someone sexually adventurous, head on over there and check out their circus of all things sex-u-al!